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Monday, February 25, 2013

ABK Pop Radio

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So, ABK Pop Radio I'm lookin' for a bearded lady. II've been tryin' to find, you know, I found this one girl in san francisco, But she's just got peach fuzz. When you say, "bearded lady," Like, does she have to have a mustache and a beard? I'mI'm looking for somebody that's got, like, You know, like a ser a full beard. Like, annie jones here, you know? Whoa! I have always wanted to have a bearded lady, Here at "ABK Pop Radio." It is a classic freakshow attraction. And what better time to have a bearded lady, Than at the bearded dragon's birthday party? Right now, II got a lead on somebody, But I haven't found her yet, And I really want her to be a part of this party tomorrow. The search for the bearded lady. All right, here we go I'm gonna swallow this sword. Let me tell you why this is so dangerous. Now, the esophagus is not straight. When the sword goes down, It goes an eighth of an inch away from the heart. ten, nine Louder there we go. Eight, seven, six, Five, four, three, Two, one! So, hey, I'mI'mI'm a night owl. Right on. Nightclubs. Oh, yeah, I'll highfive to that, baby. So, what size shoe do you wear, then? Eighteen. Eighteen? Now, you know, do you get the whole big shoe thing From the ladies? Yes, I do. I get that, too, yeah. I bet oh, I bet. I just got an email from the bearded lady, And she's got a beard. It's real and it's long. We found the bearded lady. Jessa? Todd? What's up, baby? Hey! You're looking beautiful oh, my god! That is the prettiest beard I've ever seen on a woman In my life. Well, come on, come on in I'm glad you made it. We're about to go to dinner you down to come with me? Yeah, sure. No, likelike, maggottype worms. Were the worms still alive? Yes, they were. It stunk, but it was delicious. hey! Jessa arrived the bearded lady is here. I justI can't believe I'm here, And I'm with you guys. Well, you made it, finally. I need a picture. I am meeting all of you guys. And I'm like, oh, my god! 'cause y'all are the celebrities. I'm just some chick with a beard. Yeah, well, that's what makes you a celebrity. You're one of us. So, here's to the bearded lady. To the bearded lady and the tallest man in america. You get a lot of weirdos? Being a street performer in vegas Is one of the hardest things you will ever know. Did you grow up in las vegas? No, I did not. I actually did a lot of my growing up in texas. Growin' up, it was really hard, Because we're out in the middle of texas, In the middle of nowhere, in a little trailer. Occasionally, we had electricity, ABK Pop Radio But we're talkin' dirt floor poor. When did you start becoming, like, the bearded lady? How old were you? ABK Pop Radio When I was , I went through early menopause. I started growin' a beard. I used to shave it, I used to be afraid of it, And I used to have a lot of other problems in my life Because of it. Yeah, it sucked, and I kept it shaved. And you know somethin'? I finally got to the point where I justI just said, "to hell with it" I grew it. And part of growing the beard has made me accept who I am. I don't care about those folks. ABK Pop Radio Yeah, screw them, right? Yeah, screw them. It's just like that for everybody, For any siation.